Introducing A Speaker To Evoke Applause

                      Ideally meet the speaker for a meal before the meeting. (This ensures they arrive on time. Chat enables you to prompt them if they dry up.)
Or speak briefly. Subtly remind them about what the audience hopes to hear - failure and success, rags to riches. Not all boasting. Nor no-stop moaning.
Your introduction should make the audience listen and smile - and make the speaker feel confident and welcomed.
Announce title of speech and what audience are expecting to hear.


1 Start with speaker's name - famous, easily pronounced, foreign, well-known.
2 His/ her best known achievement - have you heard of him.
3 Local connection - places or people
4 What's in it for audience? EG tips on business, slimming, health, novel writing.
5 What's in it for speaker - signing and selling books? Job-hunting? Business? Promoting book/film/charity. Loves helping people? Helping his Dad, our chairman? 6 Amazing story s/he will tell us. 
7 Say whether speaker will answer questions, and whether they will hang around or rush off.
8 During the speech look at speaker as if fascinated. 
9 End with the speaker's name and speech title.

10 Make notes so you can give heartfelt thanks. (Or pass your notes during the interval to whoever is giving thanks). Quote from the speaker. If the speaker was not scintillating, you can still quote from somebody famous praising the speaker's area of expertise, then thank the speaker for their research, or time and trouble in travelling to speak to your group. Lead the applause.

Have ready any gift or envelope containing a cheque. Ensure the speaker is facing your photographer for a photo to go on your website and the local newspaper. Do not leave the speaker standing alone. Escort them safely back to their hotel or station.

Follow up with a letter of thanks, not just thanks for visiting us and the members enjoyed your talk' but includes at least three complimentary points such as: Everybody was impressed by your Santa outfit/slide show; several members have asked me where they can buy the book you mentioned, my committee are keen for you to visit us again next year if you will be free on a Sunday evening in June or July. Once again many thanks on behalf of .... I attach some pictures and a cutting from the local newspaper ....


Angela Lansbury
Author of: Wedding Speeches & Toasts; Quick Quotations. (See Blogs and YouTube on speaking or mail me.)                                           

What's the Worst Question You've Been Asked For An Impromptu 'Table Topic'

At my first visit to an advanced speakers' club, Excalibur, in central London, I was asked, 'The (government) is proposing debating funding tantric sex for the elderly in hospitals and care homes. What do you think of tantric sex for the elderly?'
    I didn't know what tantric sex was and didn't like to ask. So I said, 'Anything that helps the elderly enjoy life is a good idea. At all ages the elderly are always perceived as anybody a year older than you are. Children, grandchildren, think that they were conceived by chocolate biscuits. Anything which keeps you happy and healthy is a good thing. So long as you've reached the age of consent and not your sex by date.'
I hoped nobody would notice I was off topic and didn't understand the question. Everybody knew.
   Afterwards I realised I should have asked the topics master what it meant. Or for a show of hands from the audience who knew what tantric sex was.
   Then I could have reacted humorously, raised my eyebrows and grinned Mae West style, "Honey - sounds good to me!'
   Or, 'Would you like to demonstrate?'
   Or blinked innocently and asked in a high pitch voice  like Marilyn Monroe, 'Do we need a license?' I could have asked for a show of hands and done a mock scientific survey, 'Seven out of ten toastmasters want tantric sex for the elderly. Please ask your PR person to tell the local paper. That should get us more members.'
   Even worse was: 'Describe the best sex you've ever had.' I did. Dead silence.
   When faced with controversial questions about sex, religion or politics, if you or the audience might be upset, the safest answer is the absurdly off topic humorous reply.

How To Welcome And Announce A Speaker: Be Prepared.

If you are introducing a speaker, ideally meet the speaker for a meal before the meeting. This used to be done at Harrow Writers' Circle in North West London. Dinner with the speaker ensures the speaker arrives on time. If they have forgotten, or get delayed, a substitute can be found such as a committee member at the dinner, or you can phone your back-up speaker. The speaker can be escorted to the venue. 

Chatting to the speaker, using their name constantly, enables you to introduce them confidently and correctly.  During the speech, if the speaker dries up,  you can prompt them to re-tell an anecdote you have just heard over dinner. You can see how this has been done on TV shows.

If there's no time or budget for dinner, speak briefly before the speech starts. Subtly remind the speaker about what the audience hopes to hear - failure and success, rags to riches. Not all boasting. (One biographer of a famous author alienated some of the audience.)

Nor non-stop moaning. A speech should end on a high note. I've sat through sad speeches where our hero, famous author, almost ended up in tears, telling his life story chronologically, ending up sniffing and moaning because he could no longer get published. (A cynic would say that if a writer had a book contract and a deadline he or she would be at home writing and not out collecting a cheap bottle of wine from the local hard of hearing group. The pensioned and retired often need an excuse to meet up for free tea and don't want to spend their last pound or dollar buying a book in small print they cannot read.)

The worst non-speeches speeches are those which start late without the speaker because the speaker got lost. Once a speaker did not turn up at all at Harrow Writers' Circle because of the London bombing. I offered to give two short speeches. I had rehearsed them three days earlier at Harrovian Speakers. I still had the notes in my bag. Now my policy is to always carry a speech in my pocket.

(I also carry a hand puppet as a prop to amuse friends or children who get bored in restaurants. I must not wander off the point. The point is welcoming and announcing a speaker.)

A late speaker often arrives in a tizz, without notes, and can only be heard by the chairman sitting alongside the tongue-tied speaker. When I am in the audience I sit at the front. So that I can hear.

Another hearing problem is foreign words. The most difficult to understand speech is mostly in a foreign language which baffles the stammering translator. How do you evaluate a speaker and give feedback, or thank them publicly, when you failed to hear and understand most of the speech.

In the UK, USA, China and Singapore I have heard the most amazing speeches by people who spoke English as a second language. But in Singapore one speaker devoted half his speech to reading from a book in Mandarin to an audience whose first language was English. For most of the audience, louder English was their second language. A pity the same could not be said of the speaker.

Other hard to understand speeches are those which don't match the title. I like titles which tell you what you are going to hear. Not guessing games. Title and speech must match.  I hate hearing a different topic. Or the opposite of the title.

For example, the literary agent whose speech on 'how to get published' tells you that you have no chance nowadays. People start zoning out. Afterwards they ask friends, 'Did I miss something?'

The worst introduction is, 'I won't tell you anything about the speaker. She can do that.'

Your introduction should make the audience listen and smile - and make the speaker feel confident and welcomed. Say how long speaker will talk and whether people can speak to them in tea break.

The best introductions I've heard were at Swanwick Writers' Summer School. I would watch John writing notes throughout the speech ready for his thank you.

Announce title of speech and what audience are expecting to hear.
1. Start with speaker's name - famous, easily pronounced, foreign, well-known.

2. His/ her best known achievement - have you heard of him.

3. Local connection - places or people

4. What's in it for audience? EG tips on business, slimming, health, novel writing.

5. What's in it for speaker - signing and selling books? Job-hunting? Business? Promoting book/film/charity. Loves helping people? Helping his Dad, our chairman?

6. Amazing story s/he will tell us.

7. Whether speaker will answer questions, and whether they will hang around or rush off.

Quote from the speaker - or somebody famous about the speaker's area of expertise.
End with the speaker's name and speech title.

During the speech look at the speaker as if you are fascinated. Make notes so you can give heartfelt thanks. (Or pass notes in the interval to whoever is giving thanks).

THANK YOU

The worst thank you is: 'Thank you for that speech and our next meeting will be on ...'

The second worst thank you is: 'We did enjoy your talk on Spain. When I was in Italy ...'

The best thank you is a summary of the speech with praise for each part, plus an enthusiastic opening sentence and an enthusiastic ending. Repeat quote from the speaker or about their expertise. Repeat the speaker's name loudly to encourage enthusiastic applause.

Thank the speaker personally. What a good time to find out if the speaker can come back again same time next year with another similar speech.

Angela Lansbury
Author of: Wedding Speeches & Toasts; Quick Quotations. (See Blogs and YouTube on speaking or mail me if you want a speaker.)

Chocolate Room, UK, Australia and other countries

The Chocolate Room opened in Harrow in May 2013. The shopfront is on station road, not the road with the station but at the T

junction just near the station but opposite the statue of Katie on the opposite side to Debenhams Department store. the shop is a branch of a worldwide group which started in Australia and now has franchises including this one.
It's an amusing place to visit. Tables for two if you have time to stop for a cup of hot chocolate. I was disappointed in the prices. £1.50 for one chocolate. No offer of a free tasting.
We bought three chocolates for £4.50 to eat after Sunday lunch. I was also disappointed in the chocolates. Nothing special. I prefer Thorntons. My companions commented that the Belgian chocolate was rather like good quality Lindt chocolates and smooth rather than greasy. But no special flavour. For stunning flavours I'd choose another brand.
What I did like were the chocolate cups. They were £10 empty, £12 filled with chocolates. How many chocolates inside?
However, on ebay I have bought sets of chocolate cups, four plus postage for a similar price. These cups are white. And the large one which lets you keep a candle underneath to melt chocolate or keep it warm.
I picked up their card which said buy 7 hot drinks and receive a hot drink free. Redeemable only at harrow. See www.thechocolateroomuk.com

Designing safer high-rise buildings

Another young person falls to their death from a balcony. It's happened in Dubai and Spain.
Habitat in Canada was a high rise complex designed like a stepped pyramid so nobody could fall more than one storey. Below balconies you should have not concrete but instead a roof garden making a softer landing.

American Spelling in UK newspapers?

American Sources - Agencies
   American and nonsense spelling? I'm  in the media and this is what I think is happening. The reason for the American spelling in UK/other newspapers is simple. An American news agency is putting out news about America which is sold worldwide to other newspapers.

Changes & Simply Pasting Up
   The other newspapers presumably pay a monthly or annual fee. They may or may not have to credit the original source. If they credit the original source, to protect the reputation for spelling and accuracy the original source might not allow them to change the original. One or two students or young people on low wages are probably paid to insert whole articles unchanged.

Spellcheckers
An automatic spellchecker makes nonsense of some words which change to those with similar spelling.

Voicemail
   If a reporter phones in the report from the scene, voice recognition types the report using similar sounds.
   Comments sent by text can also be turned to nonsense when spellcheckers are used.
   Voice recognition is also used by a mobile phone or answering service.

Salads around the world

Hotels in India gave me fruit salad for breakfast, often melon and fruits I could not recognise. That seemed strange. But now I look for fruit in hotels, as well as, or instead of, fried food.
   At home my fruit salad is always made with fruit of the day. Ideally I include some red fruit and some green, mainly because that gives a variety of nutrients. But it's also attractive to look at.
    Start with apples, sliced or cubed. Add grapes, red and green. If available add strawberries, raspberries, blueberries. I always add kiwi fruit or dried apricots for potassium which cures or prevents cramp. On holiday when away for a weekend, not crossing borders where importing fruit is banned, I can carry a bunch of grapes, a packet of dried apricots and some nuts. It's easier in a hotel if you have a buffet breakfast or breakfast in your room. Then you can add what you want.
At home or in a hotel I can add semi-skimmed milk or yogurt or both.
   I gave up bananas because I am trying to lose weight.
   Prunes help cure constipation. I look for prunes without stones. (No stones saves time, protects teeth, less to throw away and go rotten in summer). I choose prunes in juice rather than sugary syrup. I like a can with a pull-off top. I haven't yet found a brand with all three.
    If you are really strict and cautious you will avoid prunes because the latest scare story is that any high level heating is likely to destroy nutrients and cause cancer. You would also cut out any tinned fruit in syrup or bottled fruit - so only fresh plums instead of prunes and fresh ginger not ginger in syrup.
      Another rule is simply to eat natural fresh food, nothing tinned, bottled, dried. Nor with added sugars and syrups. No added colours and who knows what - the ingredients labels will mystify or scare you! Not even yogurt, only milk, because yogurt is a way of preserving milk.
    I started making fruit salads for a member of my family who had late onset diabetes which is caused by a diet with too much sugar. Eventually your body says, 'no more, can't cope with sugar'.
    Then another member of my family was treated for cancer, now in remission and we followed the diet recommended by one of the cancer websites. Fruit for breakfast and as dessert for lunch and supper. I've found that you start to like what you are used to eating. That's why most Italians like pasta. Most Asians like rice. I like potatoes. But now I have got used to yogurt and prunes. My rule is eat everything three times. If you need it for health, eat it every day for a week. By then you will be tolerating it, and after three weeks you will be enjoying it and if you can't get it you miss it.