The Rear of The Rhea Was Here - where can you see it now?

Photo of Rhea by Michael Palmer in Wikipedia.


The Rear Of The Rhea Is Here
by Angela Lansbury

What is a rhea?
First I must say
It's oddly spelled
R H E A

The rhea, like its name, is absurd
Because it's a large, but flightless bird
Some people won't hear one bad word,
Ok, let's say, delightful bird

At first, when that big bird was found
They called it rhea, that's Greek for ground
South America's rhea is taller
Thank God, our Darwin rhea, here, is smaller

Most people here have no idea
About the truth, about the rhea
Except of course, for me and you
Like emus, we've no work to do

We look up facts, so we are clear
In case we ever must confront
Bravely, without a tear, nor fear
That dear, but very dangerous rhea

Thousands write to support its cause
It doesn't have big teeth, lion's jaws
But don't shake hands, evade its paws!
It catches, clasps, kills - with long claws!

On good days it just eats long grass
So if you're bothered by too much grass
No time at down to mow the lawn
Just let your rhea march, munching, past

One lady thought it would be fun
To own a rhea, just start with one
It's lonely, so then you get two
But what d'you think two rheas do!

A year goes past, while drinking tea,
You look up, gasp, "Hey - I see three!"
They breed and breed, you've soon got four
Let's split them up. please shut that door

'We've not got room, what shall we do?
I'm sure they'd like some at the zoo
So take a picture. Shut that gate!'
'Sorry, one's gone - I was too late!'

Cute in National Geographic
Not fun, running round in traffic!
It's run, done something in the field
I hope that helps the farmer's yield

It's not good news, not a good day
It's dangerous - on a motorway!
They're lost, they're breeding, two, four, five
The good news is that they'll survive

It's like an ostrich, and will eat
All kinds of plants, but sometimes meat
Rodent, reptile. It's friends with deer
Stands calm by cows, if herds are near

An 'emu' was glimpsed far from home
Caught on camera, then mobile phone
Escaped rheas at first sound fun
Delays, expense, police - with guns

Although, from far, a rhea's cute
Shyly running, in its feather suit
Now it's escaped, they'll prosecute
Stop car crashes. Game keepers shoot

We should know more, we all agree
To talk this over, over tea
I'll go off to scan the media
Please read more in Wikipedia

Because there's lots more I could say
But we've not enough time today
Let's go out looking, all of us here
Before laws ban them and they disappear

Learn more about the backward rhea
See which facts we can muster
The prime use of its feathers
Is to make a feather duster

If you fly to Argentina
You'll find the rhea is no stranger
You see it on centavo coins
There they're not rare, nor endangered

Gouchos would trip up rheas with ropes
Eat eggs and meat, make leather cloaks.
Farmers are angry, rheas eat crops
Not bad, they're good! Here shooting's stopped!

If soon, the world's rheas disappear
Don't drown sorrow in tea or beer
Come to England, amigos, Hertfordshire
You'll see two rhea rears running here!
-ends-

copyright Angela Lansbury.
Inspired by controversy caused by escaped rheas by the English motorway, pursued by gunmen, eventually recaptured, or returned for lunch, instead of ending up as dinner.
Please share links to this post.
For the story about the escaped rheas causing trouble to motorway traffic, see
UK Escapes
http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsround/27050298
https://www.yorkshirepost.co.uk/news/what-s-going-on-rhea-yorkshire-police-find-an-emu-on-patrol-1-9014419
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/police-warning-over-aggressive-escaped-rhea-bird-on-the-loose-in-nottinghamshire-10345553.html

Escapes in Germany
http://www.10000birds.com/greater-rheas-germanys-new-big-bird.htm

For info on rheas:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhea_(bird)_

ENGLAND, UK
To see rheas go to Woburn Safari Park, England.
woburnsafari.co.uk
http://www.woburnsafari.co.uk/discover/meet-the-animals/birds/greater-rhea/

SCOTLAND
http://www.edinburghzoo.org.uk/animals-and-attractions/animals/darwins-rhea/

https://www.visitscotland.com

NORTHERN IRELAND
http://www.belfastzoo.co.uk/animals/darwins-rhea.aspx

vistibritainshop.com

CHILE, SOUTH AMERICA
Or Parc Nacional Pali Aike, Chile
https://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/ShowUserReviews-g2615237-d2461967-r346309803-Parque_Nacional_Pali_Aike-Magallanes_Region.html
https://www.cloudbirders.com/tripreport
http://www.visitchile.com/en/

ARGENTINA, SOUTH AMERICA
https://www.audleytravel.com/argentina
https://wikitravel.org/en/Argentina

Australian 12 Days of Christmas | Christmas Songs For Children | Aussie ...

Australian version of Twelve days of Christmas. I found this on Wikipedia when I was researching all aspects of Christmas around the world including Christmas carols.

You can sing along, like karaoke, or copy down the words. The words appear in white on black at the bottom of the screen. You can also slide back the yellow oblong on the red line to repeat any part you want to hear again. Or leap to the end to twelve to hear/recap the song from 12 downwards.

1 An emu up a gum tree.
2 pink galahs
3 kookaburras l a u g h i n g.
4 k o a l a s  cuddling
5 kangaroos
6 brolgas dancing
7 possums playing
8 dingoes digging
9  wombats working
10 lizards leaping
11 numbats nagging
12 parrots prattling

I must admit I had to look up a couple of the creatures. A bralga is a crane, like a flamingo but not pink, just black and white with a touch of pinky red on the back of the neck.

A galah is a pink parrot, very common in Australia. You can keep them as pets and teach them to talk.  See videos on YouTube.

A numbat is a striped anteater.

Angela Lansbury, travel writer and photographer, speaker and author.

Thoughts on safety around animals

1 Don't turn your back on an animal to take a selfie.
2 Others may be standing apparently safely near animals - but they might be attacked in five minutes time - and so could you.

An animal looking at you may be preparing to attack. A woman was taking a selfie in front of a bison in the USA. Luckily she lived to tell the tale.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3171312/Bison-injures-woman-posing-selfie-Yellowstone.html

Don't lie down either. Especially not near an emu in Australia. It could get amorous.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3171456/The-moment-emu-tried-mate-backpacker-Australian-outback.html

And while we're on this subject, keep your dog on a leash well away from water in Florida.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3171575/Woman-leaps-pond-wrestles-7ft-alligator-bare-hands-successful-bid-rescue-pet-dog-reptile-s-jaws.html#comments

I have just written a fictional book about a girl with a dog trying to escape from an escaped lion at a safari park.
It is called
Larry The Talking Dog, Cathy Cat and Escaped Lions.

Angela Lansbury, author, travel writer, photographer, speaker.