Record Your Full Name and Date On Awards

An Undated Ribbon NEEDS DATE AND A NAME
I just won another ribbon at Toastmasters. I immediately wrote the date and place on the back. I noted in my diary that I had won a ribbon. I had noted in my diary the club which I was visiting. Add the country, if you travel to other countries. On the day you know where you are. Six months or years later you will be looking at awards and wondering, where was that from?

TEACHER'S CREDENTIALS

TRAVEL WRITERS

 I went to a travel writing course at Writers' Holiday in Fishguard, Wales. The course leader proudly said that she had published more than 100 travel articles. I wondered how many I had had published. At about ten a year for ten years that would be at least a hundred, probably more. But I had no record. Her statistics gave her confidence and enabled her to inspire confidence in the audience.

SPEAKER INTRODUCTIONS

What roles have you done as a speaker?

As an evaluator or judge?

We are often told at Toastmasters International speakers' meetings that the audience won't warm to you if you start by boasting of your achievements. Also they may feel discouraged. How can they compete?

You have to show them that you started from zero and ended up a hero. (Over what time span?)

At that point I had no record.

PUPILS AND PARENTS SEEK CREDENTIALS
 On the other hand, parents looking for a teacher for their children are impressed by qualifications.

EMPLOYERS SEEK CREDENTIALS & EXPERIENCE
You need credentials when you are competing for attention in an advertisement offering a jo to candidates, or as a service provider or teacher. You also need to present your credentials in a CV (resume) when you apply for a job and at the job interview when there is only one position but several candidates.

LOSING COUNT
I started winning ribbons at Toastmasters for the best Topics speaker (impromptu speaker) best speaker and best evaluator. After I won fifty ribbons I started to lose count. I put them up in pictures frames around the house and ran around counting them. I made a list. I wrote large in my diary: I WON A RIBBON FOR ... AT  ...

 I wrote a white label on the back of the label.

PHOTO RECORD
One speaker did not keep a count of his trophies but showed a photo of himself surrounded by trophies. He told me, "I showed that photo to reassure the audience that they had not wasted their time and money. They were listening to an award-winning expert."

Add Your Names
Looking at my ribbons, which had the date and place, I realised an essential was missing. I knew it was my ribbon. But if I were to keep it all my life, I needed to note my name on it for my descendants, executors and others. I had inherited many items which had no name, wedding photos, even poems.

 Finally I remembered to add my own surname (family name). I initially wrote merely my first name, Angela.Then I added my surname. If I ever get a grandchild or daughter-in-law named Angela, other people will be confused. If I were to drop the item or lose it on a plane, nobody would be able to track me down and return it.

If you found awards in the family of a relative who had died with no name attached, you would not know whether this was an award to granny, her father, her husband, her emigrated son or daughter or a pretty or historic item she had bought in a shop.

Story Of A Delayed Funeral Due To Unlabelled Medals
My friend 'B' was in Korea in his early days and when he died his family found Korean war awards. At his funeral we had a delay because his son thought father had won awards in the Korean war and  displayed the medals on the coffin and wrote about them in the funeral speech.

However, an irate aunt said they were not the deceased man's medals because he was in a commercial service, the merchant navy, not the military. She suspected the medals were merely sentimental souvenirs probably bought from a shop or on line.

She told me, "It would be an insult to my father, who was awarded medals in the war, denigrating his achievement and honour, to display the medals as if somebody not in the war had won them!"

The moral is, label everything.

Author
Angela Lansbury, travel writer and photographer, author and speaker. 

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When you travel to a sick bed or funeral, start writing an obituary

Plane window. Photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright.

Problem
If you are on a plane to a funeral, or to visit somebody who is very sick, instead of crying, you could spend your time busily writing your memories. If they are well and recovering, you might be able to raise their morale with happy memories.

If they can talk but are fading fast, it's your last chance to ask, "Dad - where did you and Mum meet?" Or, "What made you change your name? Why did you choose that name?"

If you arrive for a funeral, you might have a chance to say a few words at the funeral. If the ceremony turns out to be one full of quotations from religious books and payers, you may get a chance to read out your reminiscence at the following reception.

If you are told this is not appropriate, or no time, you might save your information for an obituary.

Obituary
What do you say in a eulogy at a funeral and the written obituary and who can you send it to?

First of all, what is an obituary and what is a eulogy? A eulogy is a speech of praise given at the funeral.

I just went to a funeral of a young man, aged just under 40, who died during a lung transplant. The funeral speeches were given first by the mother, starting with him as a baby and a fun child, then by his father on what a fine young man he became with a successful career, finally by his sister on how kind a person he was.

No Photos
I was told that you are not allowed to take photos at a funeral. This is because people frowning, crying sobbing, are not looking their best. That's without any security concerns about attracting grave robbers or vandals. If you do take family grinning by the graveside, that would not look right either.

Who Wants Your Obituary
Wikipedia, national newspapers and other journals, even religious newspapers, might have rules about how famous you have to be to warrant an obituary.

If you draw a blank with these, your next steps are:
Local newspapers;
School and college magazines for alumni;
Professional magazines of professional organisations which your deceased person was a subscriber.
When you ring up to cancel the membership of the BBC retired staff club or actors' union, optician's group, or market research group, you can ask where you should send an obituary.

Quotations
If you can get a quotation from the head of the organisation, who remembers the deceased, this will make them want to include the piece and make it more interesting to the current membership. (Even if dead Fred hadn't been seen for years.)

Similarly, an article about a former pupil at a school is more interesting if they did something noteworthy and worthwhile. If not, perhaps they led a tragic life (cautionary tale), disappointing teachers after showing such early promise. I just reversed that sentence. The trick to sounding upbeat is to turn each sentence so that you end with words which are positive.)

I did this for my late uncle and my late father. You need to know the length limit. You may be asked for a photo. You need to gather together all the dates and facts - which can be quite difficult if the person you are writing about has lived or travelled all over the world.

With elderly people in their nineties, you may find the majority of their friends are already dead, or too infirm to travel. You may then have to rely on well-wishers from the community.

In addition to sending out news to aquaintance, you might not think of contacting, the obituary remains a vital piece of information for you and your descendants. My uncle died 16 years ago. The facts I wrote about him after he died were newly-discovered, but very fresh in my mind. However, now, when I read his obituary framed on the wall, it's as if somebody else wrote it. I have forgotten so much that every little fact is a surprise and a delight.

Author
Angela Lansbury, travel writer and photographer, author and speaker.