Chutney Mary Celebration Dinner

 Chutney Mary

A doorman greeted us in the doorway, quite chatty, greeted us and wished us a pleasant evening.

Doorman at Chutney Mary, Photo by Angela Lansbury.

On our way out, he asked us if we had enjoyed our meal. We stopped for a chat with him about our restaurant and other restaurants nearby.

Our table was one of four tables for two at the back. I though it was a small table, but easy to talk across. For a photo I set up a giant Hallmark birthday card, which I had adapted for a golden wedding anniversary but adding a hand written Gold wedding anniversary to the front, using blue tack and a staple. This was a success, balloons get in the way, intrude and leave litter.  The big card attracted the attention o all the other three tables, who all applauded, and wished us well, and I had a lovely chat with the lady at the nearest table. 

My husband had booked the restaurant as a surprise, Indian because our first date had been to an Indian restaurant. He had the set menu, and matching wines, I had the vegetarian menu because I am allergic to shellfish, and for the other dishes we got to try different main dishes. The desserts were the same on both menus. 

Service

Always somebody passing nearby who could be asked to help. For example, they escorted me to the ground floor toilet which was down a dark corridor to the fire exit passing fire extinguishers, which I thought was a good thing to note. The ground floor toilet had a keycode, operated by the waiter who escorted me. Inside was big and quite dark.

After dinner I tried the downstairs toilets, much better decorated, with lovely hand lotion. Not much further and stairs not too steep.

The lighting came from an oil container with a flame, which went out a couple of times. Being in such dim light made it hard to read the menu. I copied it on my phone. But I didn't need the menu, no choices to be made because we were having the set menu. 

Unique Champagne glasses at Chutney Mary restaurant. Photo by Angela Lansbury.

We ordered a sparkling wine to start. The wonderful Champagne glasses were perfect. Wide enough not to hit your nose, unlike the narrowest flutes. We recently changed our very narrow flutes, which in theory hold in bubbles, for wider ones. I would have liked to buy the wonderful unique glasses and wondered if they were some special brand such as Riedel. But the sommelier told us that the glasses had been specially ordered for the restaurant. 

Starter

I had avocado.

Main Dishes

Came with delectable rice.

Desserts

A small souffle containing coconut and halva, which they spelled halwa.

My husband had informed them that it was our anniversary. After our dessert they brought out a plate with a small chocolate concoction and happy anniversary written in chocolate.

Happy Anniversary written in chocolate at Chutney Mary restaurant. Photo by Angela Lansbury.

Good for a souvenir photo. Just what I wanted.

Nearest stations

Piccadilly

Green Park

Going there we started through the park, passing on our right a lovely curvy food kiosk, shut Saturday evening, then took a tunnel left, hardly wide enough for two people side by side, went in single file, standing back to let others coming the other way.

Returning to Green Park station late at night, we took the main road, slightly longer.

At Green Park station there is a long underground walk within the station to the Jubilee line going north west.

We plan to go back, at lunchtime when the lower prices of the lunch time deals are attractive.

Useful Websites

https://www.chutneymary.com/

www.fineindianrestaurants.com

https://tfl.gov.uk/tube/stop/940GZZLUGPK/green-park-underground-station

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How To Recognizei Alphabets On Signosts and Road Signs - Using alphabets

 

Indian  alphabet.

If you see a sign on a signpost you can do a screen capture and image search to match it up.

Simpler still, check the national languages, and the nearest countries.

Indian Languages\

Urdu and Hindi are almost the same. But Hindu used byy Hindu people is written in their script. Uurdu used by a mainly Moslem population is written in the Arabic script. is

Hebrew

The Hebrew script is used for writing the Hebrew language, as used in versions of the Old Testament, and prayer books in Jewish Orthodox synagogues. Also for writing Yiddish (German with a sprinkling of Hebrew and Russian words), and Ladino (Spanish, with a spriling of other language words). Hebrew letters were also used by the preist Cyril to create the Cyrillic language so the bible could be read by Russians. Cyril used both Hebrew and Greek letters which is why learning or recognizing any of these alphabets helps with the others.

Russian and Cyrillic\

Cyrillic is also used for Bulgarian. Plus a few extra letters. I found languages got easier when I stopped thinking of letters as being a task and a hindrance, and started thinking of them as a help. The same goes for vowels and diacritics, dots, and dashes which show which vowels are pronounced differently.

\Greek

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Your Traveler's Calendar

This travel calendar is useful in several ways. You can plan to hold a holiday to conincide with a festival which offers lights and parades, events, exhibitions and activities and excietment. Or you could seek to avoid the busy times with booked rooms and higher prices.

A Traveller’s Calendar

January

from Wikipedia.

Jan 1 New Year’s Day. Concert, Vienna, Austria.

USA Tournament of the Roses Parade, Pasadena, California

Orthodox Christmas Jan 7

Jan 5 Evening before Epiphany.

Jan 6 Greek & Russian Orthodox (Christian) Epiphany. (Birth of Jesus.) 

Jan 26 Australia Day. 

Burns Supper Night, Scotland. 

Jan 27 Holocaust memorial day (liberation of Auschwitz in Poland)

Chinese New Year (Moving dates.)

February

Feb 6 New Zealand Waitingi Day

Feb 14 Valentine’s Day (Ireland, Italy and worldwide)

March

March 1st St David’s Day, Wales

March 17th Irish St Patrick’s Day

March 20 French Language Day

April

April 20th Chinese Language Day

April 23rd St George’s Day, Shakespeare’s Birthday.UN English Language Day. 

Spanish Language Day.

April 25th Anzac Day (Australia and New Zealand)

May

May 1st Labor Day

May 5th Cinco de Mayo.

Jun

June 2nd Italian Feast of the Republic. Flypast of tricolor arrows, red/white/green flag colors

JUNE 6th UN Russian Language Day

20/21/22 Summer Solstice (Longest day)

July

Jul 4th American Independence

July 14th Bastille Day, France

July 18 Nelson Mandela Day

August

August 1st Swiss National Day

August 9th Singapore National Day

August 15th Indian Independence Day

September

Sept 21 Belize Independence Day Parade and Carnival

October

Canadian Thanksgiving, 2nd Monday in October.

October 3rd German Unity Day

October 31st Halloween

November

November 1st and 2nd Day of the Dead in Mexico

November 11th Remembrance Day (WWI Armistice, WW2 and all wars)

December

December 18th Arabic Language Day

December 24 Christmas Eve

Dec 25th Christmas Day

Dec 26th Boxing Day in the UK, St Stephen’s Day in Germany

Dec 31st New Year’s Eve. Midnight Mass. 

Useful Websites

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_with_multiple_capitals

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_whose_capital_is_not_their_largest_city

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New Restaurant in Hatch End, Fusion 381 opened mid 2022, with my menu translations

Fusion 381 restaurant in Hatch End, exterior showing the street number is 381. Photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright.

 Interior of Fusion 381 restaurant, showing the depiction of a lady in a large at above the bar. Photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright.

Fusion 381

The new restaurant, was new to me, and my family, in June 2022. The location is Hatch End. It is in the old, former Natwest bank building. 381 The Broadway, Uxbridge Road. When I pushed open the door, the manager or owner rushed forward to greet me.

Decor

Above the bar area is a big picture of a lady in a large hat.

The table are wipe clean wood or wood effect. The chair backs lean back and are orange at the front and blue on the back.

Some of the words on the menu which you might like to get familiar with before a visit.

bao - bun

canai - roti canai is Indian flatbread

ebi - shrimp or prawns in Japan

edamo

galangal - also called Siamese ginger (Thai ginger)

gelato - Italian sorbet/ice cream

Gyoza - sometimes described as a dumpling but more often a pasta wrap pressed together with a filling of stuffing of minced meat and vegetable, like a fan shape fried ravioli, but can be larger like a semi-circular samosa, but on this menu dumplings with apple filling.

Katsu - means cutlet in Japanese, strips of fried meat (or vegetables) in batter which you eat dipped in a sauce

julienne - sliced into short sticks, flat edged

king prawn - large prawns

mangetout - french for eat all, tiny peas served in the pod

Massaman - rich, mild, Thai curry

mirin - like sake, which is rice wine, but with more sugar and less alcohol

miso  Miso (みそ or 味噌) is a Japanese seasoning produced by fermenting soybeans with salt and kōji  (fungus) and sometimes rice, barley, seaweed, or other ingredients. The thick paste is used for sauces, spreads, pickling vegetables, fish, or meats, and mixing with dashi soup stock to serve as miso soup. 

Mochi - moulded rice cake, could be a white, ball, a dome or an oblong, and can be coloured

mouli - a type of radish

pak choy - a green vegetable. I don't like it. Asians love it.

panko - crunchy small breadcrumbs

ponzu - citrus based sauce which is colourless but brown when soy sauce is added

roti - round Indian flat bread

roti

roti   https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Canai.jpg

roti canai

shallots - onions

shichimi - spice of chilli pepper with 7 ingredients, such as 

• coarsely ground red chili pepper (the main ingredient)
• ground sanshō ("Japanese pepper")
• roasted orange peel (Chenpi)
• black sesame seed
• white sesame seed
• hemp seed^[5]
• ground ginger^[3]
• nori or aonori (seaweed)
• poppy seed
• 
  
  
  
  

tamarind - brown, sweet, tangy fruit from trees grown in Africa

Tamarind, picture from Wikipedia

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tamarind#/media/File:Tamarindus_indica_pods.JPG

tempura - Japanese fried food

tofu - vegetarian food, often white cubes like a solid mousse or feta cheese, can be fried

wok - bowl shape frying pan for quick cooking vegetables and sliced up meat or fish or other items which are tossed about

yakitori - Japanese style, grilled with tasty brown sauce which might be based on a soy sauce

V=vegetarian (vegetables, no meat)

VE=vegan (vegetables, no meat, no milk, no eggs, no animal products - which will mean no gelatine from animals)

I have already chosen what I would like to order. I am allergic to shellfish. So no prawns or squid for starters.  My choices of starters would be Indian bread with curry, or chicken skewers with sesame seed, and if we order a second different starter the duck with Peking sauce is a favourite of my family although you can order that at other places.

For my main course, there are three chicken dishes, two dishes with lemon grass, and an extra of sweet potato fries.

Fusion 381 restaurant

381 Uxbridge Road

Hatch End 

HA5 4JP

TEL 020 3859 8722.

The menu is on the outside wall on both sides of the front door, also on their website. The menu choices include

Starters

Main courses

Sides and salads include coconut rice and sweet potato fries.

I like the menu. Desserts include chocolate brownie with coconut ice creams, or apple dumpling (called gyozo).

Drinks include cranberry juice, lychee juice, prosecco, sake, cocktails, wines.

Location

By car

You can park outside. Easy to find near the Tesco Express, on the opposite side of the road to the Hatch End railway station.

By bus and train

Hatch end has two buses. The H14 goes to and from Stanmore. 

The H12 goes to Harrow Northwick Park.

Website

https://www.fusion381.com/

Food menu

https://www.fusion381.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/381food-v2.pdf

https://tfl.gov.uk/bus/route/h12/

https://tfl.gov.uk/bus/timetable/h12/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roti_canai

Update November 2025. This post is now about historic Hatch End. The latest restaurant in the converted bank is Eggholic. See my later posts.

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Bandaa East African Indian Restaurant In London, England

 

The decor is a delight of black and white and vivid colours. The chairs and banquettes have African patterns. Giant animal moulds enhance the walls. Here is an elephant with trunk and tusks. A white elephant. Against contrasting green. Chairs in different colours, orange and yellow. Variety. A lot to feast your eyes on.

The menu is extensive.I started with an excellent Prosecco from an individual small bottle. 

Angela with small bottle of Prosecco in Bandaa restaurant, Hatch End. Photo by Trevor Sharot.

Notice the African patterns on the banquette. The bamboo style metal cutlery. The African animals in the pictures.

Giraffes in Bandaa Restaurant, Hatch End. Photo by Angela Lansbury

We asked for all the dishes to be served together. I had chicken biriani. My husband chose fish in a sauce. Our sides were creamy lentils and crispy green.

No dessert menu We asked to take away the leftovers and were given plastic see through boxes with lids in a paper carrier bag.

The place mat paper menu shows a breakfast, brunch and high chai (high tea).

To make ordering simpler, you could order either the vegetable platter or the no vegetable platter r one of each.

Anything we didn't like? Not really. Oh - the cutlery with knives turned outward instead of inward.

Useful Information and Websites

Bandaa 461 Uxbridge Road, Hatch End HA5 4JS

Tel: 0203 876 6677

email: info@bandaa.uk

https://bandaa.uk/menu-dinner-takeaway.php

You can order through Deliveroo, Just Eats and Uber Eats. It would be helpful to have a glossary. I am making a list of words I need on the next post. 

Also see my later post about B & K salt beef in Hatch End. 

About the author of this travel blog

Angela Lansbury is British born and bred but has also lived in the USA, Spain and Spingapore and visited countries around the worl

She is a semi-retired teacher of English language and literature and a member of Toastmasters International and five clubs, Harrovians in the UK, three in Singapore (BHA and TCA and Senja-Cashew), a club coach for Nee Soon East, and a member of online only club, Singapore Online Dynamic. To find a club go to Toastmasters International Find a club or look on Facebook. BHA meets the first Wednesday evening each month, login 6.45 for 7 pm start Singapore time (SGT), which is noon in London UK, during British summer time, until clocks go back the last Sunday in October when the UK reverts to Greenwich Mean Time (GMT).

Do you need to explain the moral of a story to a modern audience of several nationalisties?

Whether you are speaking in person or online, you often have people of different ages and nationalities in the audience. I am a member of a Toastmasters clubs in the West and in the East.

I am a member of a club in London, England, called Harrovians. Harrow is an area with a large immigrant population, Europeans and Indians.At my London club, I have also met three Chinese people.



I am also a member of three clubs in Singapore and a Singaporean online club with speakers from the USA, Europe, India and China.

European folk tales are familiar to us in Europe. But not to others. Unless they have seen the Disney version of Cinderella.

The majority of the population in Singapore is ethnic Chinese. I belong to the English language Toastmasters clubs.

1 Cinderella And Glass Slippers
In Singapore at a Braddell Heights Advanced speakers club workshop, I referred to Cinderella, sugesting the audience should take turns telling the story. Which everyone in Europe and the USA would know.

But a Chinese listener said, 'I have never heard of Cinderella.'

The Frenhc version was written by Perrault. Most English people would greet that information with blank looks.
Disney produced a film of Cinderella in 1950. Before most of my audience were born.

I asked, 'Name a story about a girl which Chinese children would know."

Chinese Folk Tales
She said, 'I grew up knowing the story of Mulan.'

The Chinese folk tales are all totally different. A Western audience, especially the older ones, won't know them. Unless they have seen the Disney version of Mulan.

You can amuse a foreign audience with a story which will strike them as totally new. But you have to explain everything.

What is a glass slipper? A glass flip-flop? A Chinese listener is trying to work out whether it is a day shoe or a pair of evening shoes, dance shoes, ballet shoes, and what is the significance of glass?

You need to explain the moral of the story.

Indian Folk Tales
I have listened to several Indian folk tales and completely missed the moral which was obvious to the Indian listeners. Jokes and cultural assumptions can be completely different.

2, Gravestones
I ended a talk with Spike Milligan's joke on his gravestone, "I told you I was ill."

Aftereards I asked for questions. An Indian asked, 'What's a gravestone?'

He didn't understand. I xplained, 'When you bury a dead body, you mark the place with a gravestone.'

He looked puzzled. He said, 'In my part of the world we don't bury people. Mostly we have cremation. Near the Ganges they put bodies in the river."

They don't have gravestones marking non-existent graves.

Indians grown up hearing Indian folk tales.

3.The Brothers Inheriting The Seeds
I heard an Eastern story about two brothers. Both were given a seed by the dying father.

One brother planted the seed given by the father expecting it to grow. The other brother didn't plant, but kept the seed in a box.

Who was the son who cared most for the father? Which son did the father praise?

However, the punchline praise went to the brother who did not plant the seed.

Everyone applauded. Everyone nodded. Everyone agreed it was the best story of the evening. The story teller won the prize ribbon for best speaker.

I was puzzled. I thought, the audience is over-polite. The story teller has mixed up the names of the brothers.

I afterwards asked the storyteller the point of the story. In my mind, the story was similar to the biblical story. I was sure that the moral was either: you should plant seeds, work hard, or, plan for the future.

A suitable story for gardeners, investors, entrepreneurs. For parents with lazy children.

But the storyteller said the moral was: don't be materialistic. The love of the father's gift was more important than its value.

I thought, no wonder they are starving in India. That was not the thought I was supposed to take away. The moral is, try out your speech. Make the message clear at both the start at the end. Check that the foreigners have understood the characters plot, and moral and call to action.

About the Author

Angela Lansbury, travel writer and photographer, author and speaker.

I and my family have lived in the UK, Spain, the USA and Singapore. I am a trave writer and phtographer and teacher of English A level and English as a foreign language.

Please come to a Toastmasters International Club where the English clubs have a langauge evaluator or grammarian.  We also have French, German, Mandarin Chinese, Tamil and other language clubs based in Singapore and many more online around the world which because of Covid-19 are now meeting online.

I am President of Braddell Heights Advanced, meeting every Wednesday, on zoom the first Wednesday of the month but the other Wednesdays are workshops on app learncool.sg

Or quicker to type and easier to remember:  tinyurl.com/BHACOOL

Useful Websites

https://travelwithangelalansbury.blogs

https://travelwithangelalansbury.blogspot.com/2019/04/how-to-say-thank-you-in-several.html

https://travelwithangelalansbury.blogspot.com/2019/05/introducing-yourself-in-english-spanish.html

https://travelwithangelalansbury.blogspot.com/2020/01/second-set-of-portuguese-words.html Please share links to your favourite posts

https://www.toastmasters.org/find-a-club

translate.google.com

duolingo.com

Dinner Table Place Settings - plates, knives and forks and

UK and British style service
In the UK the knives have the blades facing into the plate. The forks have the tines upwards.

France and French Restaurants
Forks are placed with the tines down. I have heard ti said that this is to show the silver mark. On a wooden table you risk scratching the table. But I am British born and bred.

Indian Restaurants
Indian restaurants wipe the plates before serving.

Some Indian restaurants, especially in Singapore, serve food onto a green piece of banana leaf instead of a white plate.


Dessert in Las Vegas USA. Definitely not British.

Author
Angela Lansbury, travel writer and photographer, author and speaker. Please share links to your favourite posts.

The most luxurious - or the cheapest pull-on dresses in Singapore

I was intrigued by the name Homade Zakka. It sounds like home made. But it isn't. Mostly items made for the home, hangers and so on, but also inexpensive scarves and dresses.

Problem
Where do you buy a cheap dress in Singapore? I felt guilty after I made the impulse purchase of a 10 dollar dress from Homade Zakka. I could have spent only 5 dollars in the same shop on a satiny caftan in many prints, mainly of flowers.

Later that day I went into Robinsons Department Store on Orchard Road, Metro in the Paragon. Tangs. All had signs saying this percentage off and last chance. Lovely stuff.

But not in my price range.
I saw the pattern and had to have it. Lively reds. Soothing but vibrant royal blue.

Above all the pattern - Indian dancing girls.

I love my ten dollar dress. I wore it straight away.

The shop was Homade Zakka.

I asked, "May I try it on?"

"Cannot," she said. I wasn't sure whether she meant no fitting room or no trying because that creases the garments and you risk not wanting it if it doesn't fit. It looked like it might be too small. In which case I would have to cut the side seems and make it into a tabard with a waist level ribbon linking front and back, either pieces tying into a bow, or just fixed to make it larger, or maybe elastic.

I said, " I must try it to see if it fits" Before she had time to protest, I pulled it over my head.

"Yes, I said, "It fits. I'll buy it."

I always like to buy the item I have tried on - not another already wrapped and folded. The other one could be a different size, have a defect, or be a different pattern altogether. I once made a mistake, twice I think, and ended up with an item which was not what I wanted.

In a trice, I was out. Mission accomplished. Not a brilliant item. No cut. Not ankle length. I would need to wear it over a long underskirt. But with four colours, white red, royal blue, green, yellow and traces of black, I would be able to find something to co-ordinate.

If it did not turn out to be a firm favourite, or not nice enough to wear out, only good enough for lounging around at home, never mind, worthwhile at that price.

I thought it was good value. It even had a string-width belt with two loops to tighten it.

I happened to like the pattern which reminded me of my paintings.

The painting is religious, with the God born on a lotus flower in the middle, with his milkmaids and holy cows. 

My painting's design, I presume will cause no trouble offending any religious sensbilities, is a tree with a bird, with horses below.

You might like something else. If you arrived in Singapore and lost your luggage and needed an instant outfit, or need lots of gifts at reasonable prices, dash along here.

Cheap clothes have certain disadvantages, they may pull apart if you put them in a washing machine. The colours could run even if you wash them by hand. So hang them to drip dry over a plastic bowl or something which won't stain.

If you'd rather buy designer clothes, go into Isetan in Nex next door, and read my next post.

Zakka
Zak-ka is Japanese for miscellaneous things. Cutesy and kitch.

Homade Zakka
Ground floor
Near the bus station at Serangoon MRT beside Nex shopping mall.
I searched online for Homade and found several locations and qoo10 had other items from the same store and different dresses at budget prices from other stores.

Homade Zakka
#B2-21 Serangoon Nex
23 Serangoon Central
Singapore 556083

https://www.qoo10.sg/gmkt.inc/Search/Default.aspx?keyword=Dress
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zakka

Author
Angela Lansbury, travel writer and photographer, author and speaker.

Eat Out At National University Hospital

Problem
After a day in A and E, I went back to the ENT department for some checkups, as well as an X-ray. You are in the hospital during lunch hour. Where do you eat?

Hospital Location
National University Hospital is very convenient. It is right next to Kent Ridge MRT station.
The skyscraper building has a food court where the staff and the patients can eat, just like any other shopping mall.

Food Break
Your choice of food is varied. When I was there stalls were offering all kinds of chicken and meat and egg dishes, seafood, Chinese and Asian food, Japanese food, Indian and Malay food, Halal food, vegetarian food, a fruit and fruit juice stall, plus tea and coffee.

Choice Of Food
As usual, my husband and I differed completely on our views of the food. He had shellfish. I'm allergic to it. I had a durian dessert. He won't go near anything durian. (I kept the contents secret until I had finished.

My first thought was to go for my favourite, chicken rice, but I eat that a lot at home, so I opted for a novelty. I wanted masala dosai. However the dosai was unavailable.  Instead I had another Indian bread pancake, with two side dishes, one of which was chickpeas.

I could not try my husband's shellfish.

However, he was happy to try the Indian bread and chickpeas. he said it was good. I thought the bread was dry and so-so.

Durian Dessert
The durian was in generous amounts, but bland. It may not be the right time of year, because the McDonalds McFlurry durian promotion has just ended (October). I must say the McDonald durian was better.

This is all I got in A and E. A bread and jam sandwich and water.

What was good about the place?

Seats and Tables
Seats with backs. Very big and busy yet still no trouble getting a table.

Menus And Healthy Options
The menus showing dishes were marked with coloured ticks showing the healthiest and least healthy options.

Toilets
What was best of all? The toilets have built-in bidets. Turn a knob on the side, and you get a wash. That is much better than the old fashioned hose which sends water all over the floor and seat.

All in all, very good because it kept my escort happy.

Useful Addresses and Websites
National University Hospital
5 Lower Kent Ridge Road
Singapore 1199074
tel:(65) 5555

Hospital website
www.nuh.com.sg

Author
Angela Lansbury, travel writer and photographer, author and speaker.

Travel Teaches You The Meaning Of Life And Why You And Others Travel

Problems
Why do people travel?

1 To learn about the world.
2 To find the meaning of life.
3 To go to a place they have always yearned to see.
4 To escape from danger.
5 Thrill-seeking, excitement, end of boredom.
6 To join a joyful crowd, experience an event.
7 To find the answer to a problem.
8 To find their ancestors or a lost love they are seeking.
9 For romance which eluded them at home.
10 To earn more money. (For yourself, or your family, or your community, or to save somebody who is sick.)

When I go to Toastmasters, the opening speech by any speaker is often the Ice-breaker, when they tell their life story. Sometimes a speaker postpones their icebreaker for as long as two years.

Why? They say they were too shy. They lacked confidence. It was too challenging.

They don't want to admit to themselves or others about their past failures. They don't know how to recall the past without upsetting themselves.

A Chinese Story
Once, a Chinese girl told us her life story - in a table topic, an impromptu speech, which she later expanded into an Icebreaker. When first speaking to her I had admired her for her courage in taking the big journey from rural China to Singapore / Hong Kong at an early age. She studied relentlessly, studied at night, took two jobs, learned two new languages.

I was surprised to find out that hers was partly an escape story. Her parents were separated and hostile to each other. This made her unhappy at home, yo-yo-ing between the two. She went elsewhere to have education and job prospects. She dreamed of a boyfriend and marriage. Her qualifications and jobs and income and accommodation were gradually improving.

She has two motives. One is escape from warring family. The second is build a secure future.

An Indian Story
At another event, I heard an Indian boy's story. He was smartly dressed in a shirt and tie and business suit and worked in a finance company. He lived in a small village with an extended family. His family and the neighbours all worked day and night and pooled their savings to send him to school and then college so he could get a job overseas either from a scholarship or taking the cheapest form of transport and taking every skilled or unskilled job available and paying his way at each step.

The understanding was that he would pay back to the community, sending money from his salary to his family and those who had funded his education and travel. He would also pay for one or two or three children from his home area to go to school and college.

The second time I heard this story, I thought, I've met this young man before. But I hadn't. It wasn't a unique story. If you think you have met the same young man as the first one I met, or second one I met, probably not.

You eventually find that stories you hear form a pattern. They are not necesaarily copied from each other. They are simply patterns of behaviour. Some people are born poor, others are born rich. You meet some of both.

Some are worn down and commit suicide. Others persist and become famous for their success, like Jack Ma, Chinese founder of Ali Baba.

English And Asian Attitudes
Unlike people in England, who sneer at financiers and those who want to earn money, and wearing a suit and tie, he was very proud to be employed and earn a good salary. he said his dream has been to buy his mother a house, and he had achieved that. Now he was still working non-stop, day, evening, overtime, whatever was pleasing to his employers, whatever would keep his job and earn him promotion. Whatever would enable him to get another job elsewhere. Whatever skills he would learn to run his own company.

He has three or four motives. Fulfil the dreams of his family. Help his family. Repay debts. Start a better life.

Conclusion
Draw your own conclusion about others and yourself. I presume you reach the same conclusion that I reach. But when you ask what people learn from a story, the answers you hear are surprisingly divergent.

Why are you travelling? Are you travelling to get away from something or get to something?

Jews After WWII
After WWII, escapting Jews travelled to get away from the dangerous places and regimes and memories they left behind. Some travelled to the yearned for promised land of Israel. Others travlled as far as possble to South America or Australia.

Some tried to escape and hide their past in a totally new environment. They changed religion. They became buddhist, atheist, humanist. I met a Jehovah's witness in Poland who said he or his co-religionists might have been descended from Jews, but for safety nobody ever admitted it, and rarely discussed it, except with a dying grandparent.

Advantages Of Travel
Some went to a Communist country with no religion. Some married somebody from Asia, such as an a Japanese or Chinese or Vietnamese person who had no knowledge or or hostility towards Jews. I met a man who had married an Asian girl. I eventually learned about his grandparent's past. His mother had kept it from him, and encouraged him to travel to Asia and study Asian languages. Her wish was fulfilled. He had a new life.

Jews in WWII, the Kindertransport, have something in common with modern day Chinese and Indian migrants. You admire their enterprise and determination.

Efforts At Assimilation
It can be quite a surprise to learn the initial difficulties they faced. When you meet somebody who seems confident and successful, their past can be a surprise. I have often been taken aback on learning how they started in a dormitory, then it took five or ten years of study and working to learn a new language, get an education, a shared university room or flat, a new skill, a job, a better paid job, a well paid job, their own room, their own flat, owning a flat.

They forgot the past and kept quiet about it, concentrated on their future. If you give them the opportunity to talk, and listen sympathetically, they will tell you.

Revelations - If You Ask
The bouncy, smiling, confident, detmined youg girl starts blinking and licking her lips and sighing as she tells you her past. The suave, loud, or quiet, young man, hesistates, or stammers, when he tells you about his past.

Some tried to hide their poor origins and early suffering. They enthuse about their new contry. Others try preserve what they had lost. Others find a balance. Listen and learn.

Author
Angela Lansbury, travel writer and photographer. Please share links to this post.