Problems
You move to a new location for work or for the winter, to retire or as a tax exile. You book a hotel. You hear noises disturbing your sleep, or your reading. What was that?
Answers
Animals
Cat entering through cat flap. Climbing curtain. Opening door.Scratching on furniture or cat scratch post.
Crash, Bang, Broken!
Open window and flapping curtains knocked item off the windowsill.
Thunder
Thunder overhead. Does it matter? Firstly, you need to shut the windows in Singapore. We spent a week drying out the carpet after drenching rain blew through the window over the desk and down onto the floor, soaking all the papers which were on the desk and floor.
Yes, if I want to go swimming in a swimming pool in Singapore. The security guard will rush over to instruct you to get out of the water. Thunder means lighting and you could be struck.
Our complex was struck by lightning and the lift were out for several hours or days. The power tripped. All the food went off in the freezer - including the smoked salmon.
Office Alarm
Upright magazine holder fell over.
Laptop or mobile phone slid off pile of papers.
Fax machine spewing paper.
You accidentally hit print and what you are reading is printing.
You are working late and cleaners have arrived.
Security staff are doing their rounds.
Window cleaners outside window on platform.
Painters outside on platform.
Coffee machine signalling water has boiled.
Bedroom Buzzing
Mobile phone is getting messages on what's ap.
Fly trapped behind window pane trying to get out.
Moths in light fitting set to timer.
Toddler wakes and shakes cot which moves across floor.
Partners snoring.
Guys in next room snoring.
Pet snoring.
Daytime raucous clashing
Chinese New Year in China, Asia, Singapore, London, US cities - lion dance. - Noise of groups banging cymbals in passing vehicles and at building entrances, club lobbies, and restaurants.
Late Night disco on ground floor or top floor of hotel, especially at weekends.
Restaurant on ground floor preparing for breakfast, and shifting bins in alley on ground floor when you are on third floor (woke us in Cambodia).
Tooting
Bicycles, motorcycles, Italian scooters, Cambodian and Asian cycle taxis, and cars, hooting each other as they cross lanes and overtake other vehicles and pedestrians.
Bleeping
Traffic light signals under your hotel bedroom window telling pedestrians it is safe to cross but you are likely to be hit by vehicles turning left from your right, or vice versa. (All day long when I was working at a desk by the window in an all suite hotel in Shanghai.)
Knocking
I am in a hotel, want to bath or shower. Take off my clothes and grab a towel. Noises in the corridor.
They won't be coming here, but going to another room. Just in case, I'll lock the door and fix the chain. I could put out do not disturb but that involves opening the door and there could be CCTV in the corridor.
I hear knocking. I ask Who is it? The reply is in a foreign language. I look through the spy hole. What could it be? Just ignore it.
A key rattles in the lock and the door opens slightly caught by the chain.
This happens to me many times. What is it? Loads of reasons.
Hotel staff want to check your mini bar, change the towels, make up the room, turn down the bed in the evening. Let them in. They might be delivering a chocolate!
What else could it be? Fellow guests. Family in the next room have forgotten their key and are looking for their room.
Kids knocking on every door for a laugh.
Naughty kids have reversed all the Do Not Disturb signs to Make Up My Room.
Reception staff have brought up your final bill on last day to bandit to you or slip it under the door to speed your getaway and ensure you pay.
Once I checked into a hotel in New Orleans, checked in at the desk, got my key, and despite my protests the porter insisted on carrying some of our luggage, we presumed for a tip. We arrived outside a bedroom door in New Orleans with the porter and my luggage but the door key would not work.
I tried again.
The porter tried. "He said, Either it's wrongly programmed or the door is locked from the inside." He tried again.
Eventually the door opened, of it's own accord, from inside. For a second I thought, "There's a ghost in the room!"
A man inside peered out. I could see he was wearing a white bathrobe. He asked, "What do you want?"
I said, "This is my room". He replied, "No it isn't. It's my room."
The porter checked the key card. He tutted. He admitted, "They've issued two cards to different guests for the same room." He shook his head, "Not again! That's the third time today. Happens all the time."
Hotel TV
TV has not been turned off and the day's new programmes have started.
TV is remotely operated to play a welcome message and guide to the hotel's restaurants in local language. Turn it to English and you will be able to understand what they are saying and that the sauna being shown is not some random advertisements but in your own hotel with a discount, free offer, and opening hours - plus sauna and swimming time. They are also telling you to go to the bar for a free welcome cocktail or juice or coffee Aren't you glad you watched! (Happened to me in Hawaii and some US hotels.)
Waves Crashing
In a Florida hotel I could hear the waves outside crashing on the beach. The first night I dreamed about tsunamis and kept waking throughout the night. I had asked for a sea view. I thought, 'I should have asked for a bedroom at the back.' But the second night I was so tired I sleep through. By the third night I had got used to it. New people at the hotel were complaint that the sea sound kept them awake. I just looked condescending. Some people complain about anything and everything. (British irony.)
Country music is playing
In Opryland Hotel in Tennessee, USA, the lady who made up the room must have been instructed to turn on the radio to play country music which came on when I put my key fob in the door which activated the lights and all electrical equipment.
Today, just birdsong. It's awfully quite around here. Just the sound of me typing - and the occasional chair scraping the floor overhead. Distant churning. Must be a cement mixer on a building site two blocks away. Other people are working. And washing. I hear noise in pipes. I am not alone.
Angela Lansbury, travel write and photographer.
No comments:
Post a Comment