How to Understand Singlish and British English

I had lots of slides for my workshop at the Braddell Heights Advanced Toastmasters meeting, but was searching for an amusing attention-getting Introduction.

I found the opening words for my workshop on Business English is I hurried towards Braddell Heights Community Club in Singapore. "Today as I was walking towards Braddell Heights I received a message from Rachel asking me, 'Where are you?' I was tempted to reply, 'Reaching'. Is that Singlish or British English?"
A few people instantly answered, "Singlish!"

However, others replied, "British English?"

I smiled and shook my head, "It's Singlish!"

Somebody asked, "What would British people say?"

I suggested, helped by members of the audience:
"I'm on my way.
I'm nearly there.
I'll soon be there.
I'll be with you shortly.
I'll be arriving any minute."

I suggested that they should get out pens and paper and write down phrases they liked which were new or useful.

A Couple Of Minutes
My next story: "I was recently told that in Singapore if somebody says, 'I'll be there is a couple of minutes,' don't stand on the corner of the street checking each passing car and frowning at your watch. You could be waiting half an hour. To British people, a couple of minutes means 120 seconds or less. A Singaporean does not take the phrase literally. He or she thinks it means soon."

More Singlish - Uncle said: "Go Straight? Cannot?"
Cannot. (Means I can't or you can't or it is not possible. In British English you need to add the subject, unless you are issuing a command such as 'Go!')
Go straight. (Go straight ahead.)
Uncle. (Addressing any older person whose name you don't know. You could be speaking to a taxi driver. They do not have to be related to the speaker in any way.)
Aunty. (Likewise. Addressing any older woman.)

Phoning Telephone Operator Answering
I gave a one hour workshop. The participants were paired and asked to pretend to be a member of staff in an office answering the phone and a caller.

This exercise was an amazing success. They loved it. Such high spirits. Such fun.

One couple played an irate woman employee and the called was a man who persistently called a wrong number. At one point she told him, angrily, "I told you before ..."

I suggested that it might sound more polite to drop the personal word you and be more neutral with a phrase such as, "As I said ..."
However, she repeated my words in an angry tone, 'As I said!'
The audience was in hysterics.
I pointed out that being polite and sounding friendly also depends on your tone of voice.

I recommended the use of Grammarly. It checks spelling and Grammar. 

Word has a spellchecker and grammar checker built in.

To find more:
grammarly.com
goodenglish.org.sg
Duolingo is a free internet service for learning English.  It does teach Mandarin and Indonesia but does not teach Singlish.
Google translate translates into English from many languages, but not Singlish.

Author
Angela Lansbury, travel writer and photographer, teacher of English and other languages.